This is Rune.
Ruby's at our father's for the summer. The law requires it; don't pester me about it.
She's fed up with a lot of what's happened here anyway, and every time I come on here
or check discord I find another reason to justify not fully coming back myself. I'm finishing
up MY LAST 2 CLASSES for the semester. I will be on summer break in about 2 weeks.
However, I'm most likely going to stay anti-social; I've spent a few months rediscovering
things from my childhood; back when I was coping with other issues, and honestly; I
forgot how great it felt. I've been in a good mood constantly, and I think my depression
has mostly gone away. I'm not going to be a baby, and run away from things, yet I'm
no longer doing things for others. Frankly most people don't deserve it, and I see way
too many people that make me question humanity. Myself included. I've made rash and
horrible decisions in the heat of the moment, and I regret them. I can't change the past,
and even though I feel sorry for my actions those who I've hurt won't easily accept this,
and I understand that. But it is DUE TO THIS; that I'm going to live for MYSELF from now on.
I'm better off living for myself instead of others. I'm happier this way; I don't hurt those who I
care for, and I don't open myself up to people just to get stabbed in the back.
As for people who are worried about me and my sister. Thank you. I'm not going to keep apologizing
and saying that I'm going to come back, and never follow through. I do see you as my friends, but
I think I'm better off staying alone, and observing people from a distance. Small interactions here and
there, but I'm not a social person. I may know exactly how I WANT to act, and I may act much differently
in reality than what any of you truly know or understand, but It's because of how I've acted in the past,
and the consequences that have followed that have left me to this solution. I've pissed off a lot of people
I truly wanted to open up to, and befriend, whether it was something I actually did; or a lie someone else
spouted to defame me, and ruin me. It doesn't matter regardless. It happened. The people who have blocked
me; I truly apologize for the past, but I want you to know; that I'm moving on. Not for you, and not because of you.
Not because of any 1 person aside from myself. After secluding myself for a few months I've come to recall what it
is to be ME. I want to protect, and care for so many people; I just screw up and wind up hurting myself, and those
I care for. So I'm distancing myself. Kanierika Playrina PrincessSkyler
I'm sorry I pestered you with constant interaction. I've never been good being social, and I let the power I thought I had with stupid hypnosis take control of my actions.
Even after I stopped caring about it; I never came back to actually apologize and inform you of how I felt. I went too far, and I understand if you don't want to comment
or even talk to me. I don't expect to become buddies after this, and chances are I won't even interact with you from this point forward. I've mostly moved away from hypnosis
in general, and every time I look back at my past with it; I feel sick with how I behaved. You can take this apology however you want; accept it or not. Ignore it; move on.
I'm not going to go into what I did with anyone. Everything I did with an individual stays private, and I've deleted everything I have on my accounts that are related to the past.
If you have something that you regret doing with me; you only have what's on your account to worry about. I've formatted my mac; so all local data is gone, and I'm going through
clearing anything I've missed on my social media. For one last time; I'm sorry. Thank you for putting up with me when I was acting the way I did. At the time; I did enjoy the time we
spent together, but now I can't think back to that, and not feel regret. kittycatisca TsundereAquaria
I appreciate that you 2 constantly look out for my sister and I. It really means a lot, and I must apologize if I've made you 2 stress with worry.
I know you 2 especially enjoyed the time you spent with us, and I want you to know that I don't hate either of you. I really did enjoy our interactions.
Even now I don't regret the hypnosis related things. With you 2; it felt at least enjoyable. Maybe it was because It was for me, and not what others wanted;
maybe it was another reason. Anyway; Thank you
Now that that's all been said; Thank you all again. I'm starting over. As easy as that is to say; I mean it. I'm spending the summer to improve my life, and work on some projects I've wanted to do
for a while. I'll be posting to Tumblr for sure, and maybe using this deviantart account since I paid for core. But I must inform you; that I don't plan on talking with people. Notes...maybe time to time, but I'm more than likely to stay away from discussing anything in the public. Even on my own profile